All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
This is ridiculous. It's like playing possible STD Clue, and I don't want to be the winner.
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Just walked in on my older brother getting a bj. He told the girl to "keep going" and then attempted to high five me
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
Nothing says "lifelong friendship" like FaceTiming in a sex shop.
I made everything so magnificently awkward in under 15 seconds. I am magic.
THE PRUIS IN YOUR DRIVEWAY IS NOT YOURS
excuse me?
I accidentally borrowed your spare keys a while ago...i just tried them...that, my friend, is not your car.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
He texted "fuck you" before blocking me on all social media. Come to think of it, that's also the last thing my mother said to me. Could it be that I'm the problem?
I'm that daughter that had to send her mother "DON'T GET SHITFACED" & yes, in ALL CAPS.
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
Randomize
