Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
i decided i am going on the Justin Bobby plan for success. Don't cut my hair for a year, don't shave for a month, land Audrina Patridge. Game on.
his dick makes me think maybe a monogamous relationship forever is possible.
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
Talking to friends parents while buying all the things needed for Jell-O shots. classic
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
Randomize
