Whatcha textin bout Willis?
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
2016 was supposed to be my year of being a ho, but I guess 2017 might be too.
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
Randomize
