sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
she was using a pencil to fish crushed adderall out of a plastic bag. it was like a college version of fun dip
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
im calling her cock vulture from now on
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
First date was awkward. I think I just saw someone die.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
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