Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
he told me he was a Boston Bruins fan so I took his hat into the bathroom and peed in it...I've never been a prouder Ranger fan
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
I never should have let my cousin and his pregnant girlfriend move in with me. I'm never having sex again. They scare off men more than 'my dream wedding' pin board.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
Apparently 'ewww' is not the correct response to him saying he has to go to a funeral while I'm there.
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
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