don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
We started making out, then he decided to get naked, put on a condom, and proceed to dry hump my leg, sweat pants and all, until he blew his load. I thought this was college. I immediatly left claiming I can't sleep in other people's rooms. He didn't even bother taking off my hoodie.
he's legally blind and likes the sound of my voice, good enough for me.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Omg this is like trying to sleep on a pile of ballsacks.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
I feel like I should acknowledge that I see you as a human and not a ragdoll sex object
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
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