I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
Randomize
