ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
All these girls I talk to are like I've never had a hangover and I'm like you don't drink right here let me show you
well I woke up with about $3 in odd change and a note that said "I'm borrowing your weed." So, no, it didn't go to well.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
Don't forget the part about the bar bathroom stumbles.
Oh damn, you're right. I have to include that. You turned off all the lights with your head. That was impressive.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
Drank your wedding present. Sorry
She gave me a boner for the first time in 9 years.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Randomize
