Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
I'd say I'd distract him, but I lose my psychic powers when guys get girlfriends. And by psychic powers I mean taking off my top.
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
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