She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
She's the drunk girl with the air-horn and sunflower seeds.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I love that my family celebrates every holiday with a joint. Chanukah? Mazel-juana! Easter? What's more spring than the color green? Election day? What better way to celebrate democracy in action than medical pot?
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
Randomize
