The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
Whats the opposite of morning wood? Whatever its called, everyone saw it when it fell out.
They had miseltoe over the keg.... thats cheating
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
Last night I got drunk on margaritas at an Irish pub and came home with only one shoe. I have to get my shit together.
You really know how to show Monday who's boss.
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize
