If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
just put an icicle in the bong. best/worst idea ever. i think i can taste global warming right now.
I'm gonna have to fantasize about her dying just to get off.
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
He woke up & asked where his pants were then asked where he was then asked who I was. Been married 20 yrs. He was drunkest ever.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
Randomize