why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Am I the only one that feels like there are hundreds of tiny people having a rave and stomping and kicking around inside my head this morning?
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
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