ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
My mom had to physically restrain me because I wouldn't stop acting like a dinosaur.
I just found a 2 minute video on my phone of you throwing up in a fake plant.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
Did he seem like the type of guy that would maybe take weed as payment?
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
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