Dual....:-)
How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
Best morning ever. I saw a bum giving another bum a blowjob downtown.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
Got laid last night using the intro line of "rate your hurricane evacuation plan on a scale of 1-10"
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
I'm playing trivia and drinking margaritas so now is not a good time.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Randomize
