Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
I made out with a guy because he was sitting on my coat...
I've just informed her that you've voted her Chief-Adult-In-Charge-Of-Shit and that she will take the oath of office on Fri Dec 14th at 8 pm with her hand on a bottle of Jager.
You were fine, but your knee injury definitely came from interpretive dancing like a gay fairy with lead wings all around the Mission St BART. Everyone thought you were on drugs.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
His dick was so bent it was like fucking captain hook's hand for 2 hours
Your drunk naked friend is roaming the living room. Started roaming my room. Please come retrieve him
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
"Are we not going to talk about how you got so drunk that you swallowed someone's pet gold fish, whole?"
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
I swear it’s like he’s filling my soul via my vagina
Randomize