Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
just go where the car takes you. fingers crossed its here with breakfast.
we are blowing up condoms and making balloons and we’re drunk on the floor. You could have come to school here
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
The guy i took home was a circus freak. He jerked off 3 times in front me after we had sex. And he came every time.
Randomize
