What started out as a threesome has become me sitting here watching them have sex... Can I get a ride home?
Nothing commands respect in a meeting like Jack Daniels on the breath. You're fine.
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
I wish i was in the wii world.
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
I'm high, watching "Scream" and eating a grilled cheese sandwich off my boobs. I'm not going anywhere
Come on, clusterfuck. Put on a pushup bra and get your fine ass to the bar, or you will be a sad single stoner forever
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Randomize
