Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
I actually had to roll up my long sleeves to masturbate. I hate the winter
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
This is the prime rib incident all over again
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
Randomize
