So she started giving everyone lap dances, and i was like "i think i like this chick"
Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Thats just a parental red flag. They have been brainwashed. Lets baptize them into the church of PBR
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
1st date with cop went weird. He yelled at me & we had a horrible date. Walking to the car I tripped & started bleeding & then he made out with me. Is it wrong that I want to see him again?
THIS IS WHY YOU NEED THERAPY!
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Randomize
