i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Randomize
