You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Fortunately for myself I'm twice as smart and half as drunk as everyone else. All things considered I'm leaving here three-to-five times richer than when I arrived.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
Sorry bud. Having a shitty day because the GF broke up with my wife and I. We really liked her too
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
In other news, last night I told somebody they made eczema look so good they should call it sexzema.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
