belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Ik youre sleeping but fyi its 5:32am I'm sitting in the middle of the road bra less and shoeless with boxers in my hand and no ride. Shits real crazy.
Randomize
