guys are not supposed to queef...right?
so her cute freckles turned out to be blackheads
I still can't believe I found a dildo in my ceiling today.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
this hospital has no fireball
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Randomize
