She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
I just smoked my last bit of kief with a grill lighter. This is what crackheads must feel like.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
The cat just walked up and made eye contact with me while I had sex. I'm going to have to burn the house down with him in it.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
I need you to sex the hangover out of me again.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize