i was more sad about losing him as neighbor on fishville than as a boyfriend
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
So she said she could really go for a cheeseburger and I remembered I had one in my pocket. No idea where it came from.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
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