Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
He pissed on a police station. Then expected to not be arrested. Sounds accurate.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
scotch tastings during the week is a baaad idea. i woke up w no pants but wearing my winter coat
They should invent shampoo and conditioner for sex hair. I would buy all the travel size ones.
Randomize
