i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call.
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I just sent you a google doc listing all the reasons why I should stop hooking up with him. Feel free to add to it.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Randomize