I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
Walking down the street trying to find the pants I had on last night
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
I masturbated to my balding thirty-something co-worker last night. I am a new level of lonely.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
it is time to test the effects of half a loaf of bread and overconfidence on the human body
Randomize
