mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
I just woke up in the 4th floor lounge at 5:30AM with my ipod on to springsteen and a condom on
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
i don't know how the hand towel got involved, but i peed all over it
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
Hooked up with a guy that looked like Dean Thomas. Mediocre at best, but I stopped myself from calling him Dean in bed. So I got that going for me.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
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