Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
After so many times of carrying your puked covered clothes home in a bag on a Tuesday morning, you begin to realize that Fucked Up Mondays aren't a real thing.
I should work for the FBI. Or planned parenthood.
That's quite a broad spectrum. What did you do?
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
You proceeded to get into a playground school bus and yell "all aboard to Margaritaville!"
I swear if he puts my hand anywhere near his dick tonight I'm "accidentally" leaving all my rings on
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
Question: anytime during the past week did I drunk dial you and give you full permission to grab my boobs? Cus I know I said it I just don't remember who I said it to...
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Randomize
