I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
I have six drafts of messages to you that just say "blood" and I have no idea where they came from.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
It's my vagina- remember its magical and yes I just did mini spirit fingers
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
Tell them to carpool to pride, have a 3way, and if one says 'no thanks' just tell em it's not gay if it happened in a 3way!
I know he's married but I don't know how else to show sympathy! Nudes are my only emotional currency.
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
So what happened at girls night? My roomate found me passed out locked out on the front steps of the house and it was raining. Yes low moment
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
