Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
i felt horrible..i wanted to somehow give him his vcard back
that's a non refundable transaction sweetheart
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
Nothing says "Good Morning" like Jell-o shots and coffee cakes.
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
There's times when I need to be plowed... and I'm ashamed to admit auto correct was able to predict that entire sentence.
NO. FUCK YOU. I HOPE SOMEONE REPLACES YOUR LUBE WITH HOT SAUCE.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Randomize
