I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
There's a sucker born every minute but swallowers are harder to find.
So glad I found your sister.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
I was so scared, I actually heard my grandmother's voice in my head saying if I get pregnant, then my vagina will fall off. And then I'm going to die.
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
You were holding up a boot and yelling boot gang
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
The DJ was throwing glowsticks into the crowd and managed to smack one guy in the face with them
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Was just messaged by someone in a Power Ranger suit on OkCupid... Figured you would approve
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
Randomize
