you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Tried to eat a sandwich this morning. Couldn't. My jaw is locked up. These marathon blow jobs are killing me
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
we had a "who's sex playlist is better?" fight.....
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
I'll meet you in hell with unlimited boxes of wine though
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
That moment when you're in a room with 3 guys and know how big their dicks are. Then you are married to the one with the smallest dick.
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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