Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
I asked him where the store BJ's was and he unzipped his pants.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
The smell of mosquito spray completely ruined the sex.
Ran out of deodorant. Febreze on a paper towel? Kicking college's ass.
The cup holder in my recliner holds a whole bottle of wine. That's definitely a sign.
After we finished having phone sex he proceeded to serenade me with Ave Maria. It was magical.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
Putting a bow on your dick doesn't make it a real present
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
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