I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
Pretty sure God shed a tear when I put 15 singles in the collection plate.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
I've woken up in some weird places in my lifetime, but never in a tent in my own garage.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
We're doing it in the traditional way of discussing why we dislike each other while sharing a bowl. Just like the natives do.
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
"Stranger danger aquaman" were the last words i remember. help me.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
Randomize
