You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
You better be coming back...your date is passed out in a shrub in my backyard and I'm pretty sure her shirt is on my kitchen floor
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
He had a tramp stamp of his own phone number. You can't tell me that isn't smart.
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
You know you can't live off of vodka and pizza rolls forever
I'VE ALREADY MADE MY CHOICE
If I send Ben a tit pic but I do it while wearing a Tom Brady mask is that funny or creepy
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
My New Year's resolution consists of less weekday hangovers, more sex, and more money.
I just bought a bottle of dried bees on Etsy. I am the wrong person to talk you out of this.
Randomize
