Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
can u get pink eye on your cock?
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
Good lord, they've set up every firework to be ignited by a trail of gasoline at midnight. God save us all.
We are possibly on our way, unless we see the limo full of strippers.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
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