The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
I don't think I'm allowed to have Burger King. What if i just chew for taste and not actually consume. Like a wine connoisseur for fast food
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Why is it I can't go buy redbull and tylenol pm from a store without getting questions about my health choices?
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
