Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
I came home to burning cookies and him outside "tanning" naked.
He just wants an even tan
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
Tuesday
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
Got upgraded to First Class and now I’ve got the whole Pacific Ocean to seduce the very hot gentleman sitting next to me!!! Door closing, wish me luck!
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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