My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize
