Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.
in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
what's for breakfast?
Advil and throwup
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Had no idea what his name was when I woke up. Went through his desk, found his tax records. Ben. And loaded.
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
All I want is to get as high as I did that time I started hallucinating that my brother was becoming a monkey and I saw my mum on every surface of your room.
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
Randomize
