they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Drunk, high, and in a taco costume. Wish you were here.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
the only thing I remember was some guy took out his fake eye to use it for beer pong
Babe if there was a way to give a back rub and head at the same time that's what I would ask for my birthday, Christmas and of course right now. Please think about how and get back to me.
Randomize
