I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
not totally sure where im at but i think i've definitely woken up on this couch before. bong on the coffee table looks familiar. should be able to find my way home
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
I just heard myself say the sentence "I'm gonna go to the bank then take a nap". 8 year old me just slapped my present self through the space-time continuum for being an old fuck.
when we woke up this morning she was missing two teeth. the front two.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
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