my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
how do you say happy birthday to the guy that almost got you pregnant? i cant just write the same thing as last year.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
This is going to be BYOBM Vegas trip: Bring Your Own Bail Money.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Is it weird that the best sex I've ever had was to Barbara Streisand's Christmas album?
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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