i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
just come out here and I will go home with you...
I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
Randomize
