I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
My parents just told me I first got drunk when I was 4. Successsssssss
I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
at least he lost his v-card with a bang... or should i say the clap.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I don't know, but I assume drunk me had her reasons. I trust her judgement.
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
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