I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
god, a vagina is an amazing trump card
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
Can my mom come with to the bar? Prince just died and I feel like I need to take her out to cheer her up.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
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