the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
Def something wrong w taking plan b with your daughters juice box
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
Life isn't about who you kiss, drunk, at midnight. It's who you text nonsense to, sober, from the toilet.
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
I'm sitting naked on my bathroom floor and it remind me of us.
That's my way of saying I miss you
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
Randomize
