Christians are straight up FREAKS
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
never try to heat up a hot pocket in the dryer if ur microwave breaks...bad idea.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I don't remember anything but yelling at the ref in Spanish.
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Whoever invented the gimlet should be given a medal and then shot
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
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